Why would I need a smart phone?

If you knew Patrick, you know that he never wanted to be trendy. Sometimes it seemed like he was against something just to have something to debate about. He always claimed to hate his cell phone and regularly threatened to get rid of it.

I can’t remember exactly when he got his first cell phone but I’m pretty sure I bought it when he was taking the bus on a road trip. Breaking down was always a possibility and I wanted him to be able to call for help. I’m kind of amazed that I ever got him to carry it!

He really didn’t like to talk on the phone that much, unless it was to annoy a telemarketer or catch up with a relative or old friend. He constantly threatened to get rid of that phone and I told him I would just buy another one. He liked to keep them as long as possible. I always wanted him to upgrade so he could do things like take pictures and also just to make it easier to text.

Once, he went fishing at Shaver and he put his phone in his pocket. He stood up on the boat for something and the phone dropped into the lake, never to be seen again. He texted or called me from Dina’s phone to let me know what had happened. I loaded the girls up and headed to the phone store for a replacement. I knew if I waited for him he would refuse to get one!

His final phone was a flip phone. It was out of style when he got it. We liked to tease him about it and he would act offended. Then he would start in on all the reasons his phone was actually better. I’m sure he had a lot of reasons but I remember that being cheaper was one of them. Also, he bragged about how small his phone was.

Of course, if he ever wanted to know any trivia or obscure information he would say, “What are you waiting for, someone look that up”. And I would tell him he should get his own smart phone. His response? Why would I need a smart phone? I already pay for three of them!

Ironically I think he would have really enjoyed the features on a smart phone. He would have liked taking pictures and he probably would have enjoyed having better quality pictures of the girls on his phone to show people. And he definitely would have appreciated the easier texting. I used to laugh as he struggled through typing a long text. One time we were talking about sending a message to Sierra. So he starts the painstaking process of hitting each key multiple times. I couldn’t help it, I gave him a fairly long head start…then I picked up my iPhone, spoke the message into it, and hit send before he could finish. He wasn’t amused, lol.

He liked to tell everyone how awesome his phone was. He extolled the virtues of the flip phone and the fact that it folded up so small. The phone DID have internet access but the screen was so small, I’m not sure how easy it would have been to use.

The phone’s most useful feature, according to Patrick, was something that he liked to demonstrate, usually while sitting in a restaurant. He would proudly state, “How many of you can put your entire phone in your mouth?” And then he would proceed to demonstrate.

Camille was the first to point out that he made it his entire life without getting a smart phone. He would be really proud of that.

I’ve been wondering about the flip phone for two years. I knew it was evidence in the case but I never wanted to ask about it. I finally got it back in July. I plugged it in to charge, not sure if it would work but I could tell it was charging right away.

After a few hours I was able to spend some time looking through it. It was a bit of a challenge after using an iPhone for so many years. I was surprised that it had Bluetooth in addition to internet access when he used it. I turned off the service after he died so I can’t access that now. There were also several pictures of the girls and some probably don’t exist anywhere else. At some point I will take the SIM card in to see if there is a way to get the pictures off of it. In my next post I will tell you more about what I found on the phone. As I had hoped and expected, there were some gems. 😊

First Day of School

Today was the first day of school for Clovis Unified. I watched as all my friends posted pictures. I never did the cutesy pictures. I wasn’t that organized! Seeing all of the pictures today reminded me of all of the first days and how much fun it was to watch the girls grow into young ladies. I’m glad that Patrick was there for most of that journey.

This is actually the most momentous first day of school yet for our household! Today Sierra started her first day of law school at Loyola Law in Los Angeles! We actually moved her a week ago since she had orientation last week. Then she came home this last weekend and it will be the last time for a while I’m sure.

She already had homework even before classes officially started today. I can already see a change in her. She left to go back before noon yesterday so she could do homework. She used to leave at 6:00 or 7:00 to go back to Long Beach!

Patrick would be so proud of her! She’s always been a good student but she has shown tremendous resiliency in the last two plus years. I’m happy that they both developed their father’s focus when it comes to school work. I did okay but I have to say their grades more closely resemble his.

My current class is on crisis and trauma. Today I read an interesting passage in my textbook, Crisis Assessment, Intervention, and Prevention. The authors, Lisa Jackson-Cherry and Bradley Erford, said “Successfully dealing with adversity often results in an outcome that is better than one that might have been reached without the adversity”. It seems odd to say that my girls are doing better because of Patrick’s death but I think they have each found their own way of dealing with adversity and in getting through this, they have become stronger. I believe that they consciously made this decision and are not only merely doing it because it’s what is expected. I am proud to call them my daughters!!!!